Long Song | I Am Starting To Post My Songs To My Blog!

My introduction to the world… I started life with longer years but they keep on getting shorter. Well, in my head anyway.

Here’s a song I wrote on the subject, and I’m just too self-concious to post the tune. But maybe if you keep up with my Instagram it will be on My Story…

Writing songs is something I do all the time, I think maybe I should start putting them out there, along with the poems and stuff. I know what’s more popular, but they say to be yourself?

img_0282

Taken from my Instagram @kittyjadeonline

And another year passes.

My mind goes old.

Not my fault, it just goes so quickly.

And I’m speeding up the pace as every year goes faster…

Than the last.

 

And as every year grows longer.

I set more goals.

But it keeps on getting faster.

My mind grows old.

Oh what am I gonna do without it anymore?

Without the time that I could of spent some more.

And the pace it gets faster as,

My mind grows older.

And I don’t know what to do anymore.

 

Faster and faster. Around they go.

Faster and faster. To hope I say no.

What am I gonna do without it anymore…

Without the pace as it quickens:

I’m really old.

Now.

Goodbye.

The Clouds in My Head | Poem

Dark and grey,

It was a cloudy day.

I couldn’t see through it.

It was in my head.

 

Light and blue,

A cloud or two.

I couldn’t see depression.

It was in my head.

adult black and white darkness face

Photo by Juan Pablo Arenas on Pexels.com

Heavy and yellow,

Clouds like marshmallow.

I couldn’t see around it.

It was in my head.

 

No, I couldn’t see through it. 

It was in my head. 

My head has no eyes yet the ones that face forward.

Because you’re never in front, I can’t see behind.

I’m not losing the race for the one who’s blind.

I’m Better Now | A Poem To The Media

Oh nostalgia, I remember you, yesterday and last year.

I remember starting my blog and beginning to love myself.

It was all of a bit of a blur really, because some of it has gone.

The laughter the love and the tears,

Suddenly there’s none.

Haha nostalgia I look at you, when I’m flicking through My Story.

I see you looking through the eyes of me… just a tap and I’m pretty.

Those friends I don’t talk to much think that is what I’m like…

But no, I’m much more ugly.

I wish like long ago I pick up my phone to start writing.

To be able to write with freedom, not fear or scare of fighting.

I just wish the Internet was happier, a better place to be.

Because right now when I turn you off there’s a feeling inside of me.

I’m better now. Better if without you *media*.

When I Grow Up | Will I Grow Up

I sat, meditating,

Thinking, not about… fate-ing?

My mind, was a boil then,

My life, won’t pick up a pen.

Where am I now?

Am I meant to bow?

I’m on a stage, but in the wings,

Just drawing curtains.. and things.

That works both ways actually.

I’m pulling away the curtain so people can see,

The main show.

The big woe.

The drama, people sow.

But I’m drawing things as well.

Drawing life, drawing people, drawing plants.

And that’s where I feel good.

Not at the back of the stage.

I want to be behind the page,

At least getting the minimum wage?

I am too anxious to go out there.

Onto the stage of life?

I’m too worried to care.

Just cure my OCD but keep me mad.

If I was normal… I’d be very sad.

What is normal?

I will answer next.

Not in poem, but in pure text.

I can’t bear people thinking normal is what they are,

Normal? You want to be normal?

A spaceman driving a car.

img_1650

Hello, and Goodbye | Poem

So these are some images of emails I’ve been sending to myself from a different computer (and account). I couldn’t copy and paste them on my phone so I just screenshotted them for you. This is a poem about my current mental state 😉 I hope you enjoyed it!

Thanks for reading, beautiful.